Make Your Time Count

As I write this, I am lying in bed at a hotel. It is midnight, and my mind is all over the place. I am in my hometown of Rockford, Illinois, for a funeral for a friend of mine. He and I have not talked or connected in a while. I wish I had taken the time to reach out and check in. His death came out of nowhere; he had recently returned the week before to celebrate his mother's 50th birthday. He got home from the flight, laid down for a nap, and passed away in his sleep. He was only 26 years old. This one hurts and scares me to death.

I lay here thinking this could have been me passing away in my sleep. He was a great person who always spread positive energy and always kept a smile on his face. He and I shared many laughs on the playground as kids growing up. I do not think I ever saw him in a bad mood. I keep thinking about what a blessing it is to grow old and how we tend to take that for granted. We act like we have enough time to blow, but we never truly know when it can all end. Life is precious, and he had no idea that he would leave the earth so soon.

He certainly made all his time count after reading his mom’s Facebook posts; he had his own business and showed no sign of slowing down. He had moved to Arizona, where he knew no one and had no connections, but somehow made it happen. I know from experience that this is very tough, and not many people get credit for going to a new place where they know no one. This can take a toll on your mental health. Your faith must be strong, and staying in the right headspace is hard.

What has stood out to me over the past few days is his impact on so many lives in his 26 short years. Most people think you have to be crazy talented like Kobe Bryant or Tupac to leave a lasting impact on this earth. Most people may feel you must do something on a MASSIVE scale to be remembered. But it is just as simple as having a positive impact on others, supporting people, and being there for the people you love. Every day, we can cement our legacy by simply reaching out to others, picking up someone who may be down, listening, and offering help. Or say, “I love what you are doing; keep it up because I believe in you.”

A little bit of that can go a long way, especially for someone working their butt off for an extended period and they start to question whether or not they should keep going. A compliment could change things around for that person completely. It could even keep them from harming themselves, and I promise they will never forget your kindness and good heart. The way you treat others, the way you help push and support others, and how you make them feel can outweigh material accomplishments.

As stated in the paragraph above, I deeply regret not contacting my childhood friend over the last few years. I have to be honest with myself and admit there is no excuse for not reaching out, checking on him, and seeing how he was doing. I get it; we all get focused and busy with life, and I am forever guilty of this. We should take some time out and check on the ones we love. Whether it is your mom, dad, sister, or cousin, it doesn’t matter. Even if it is a friend you haven’t heard from in a while and you are nervous about breaking the ice...reach out! My uncle once said, “Death is like a sniper, and we never know who may go next.” We never truly know when we may be talking to someone for the last time. Savor those moments so you do not feel the way I am feeling right now. If you spend time and reach out to loved ones during their time here on earth, when they are called home, you will have no regrets.

With that being said, we never know when we will be called home, so whatever immortality project you have thought about creating, what's stopping you? Whether writing a book, starting a business, leaving that job, etc. We only live one life, so why not do things you love? Ask yourself, are you happy with where you are right now? If yes, that’s great, but if not, ask yourself what’s that thing you have always thought about doing and what’s stopping you from getting there.

I remember wanting to write a book and constantly putting it off, making things up for reasons like I don’t have time, I don’t know how to publish, etc. I realized if not now, then when? I sat there momentarily and realized there would never be a perfect time like everything else I had done. I started setting small goals writing a few sentences each day. Whether on break or before bed at night, I kept moving forward and took it one step at a time. Before I knew it, I had pages upon pages of material. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. But first, you must work up the courage to take that first bite. Think about your time scrolling social media or watching Netflix or HBO Max.; time that can be spent towards that can significantly impact your life and your legacy. Be honest with yourself in this chapter and reflect.

Who are some loved ones you have not contacted that you may miss? Write them down here and make a plan to reach out:

What immortality projects have you been thinking about doing but have not started yet? List them below and include how AND when you are going to get started:

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Remember, treating others with honor, dignity, and respect is the easiest way you can do to leave a lasting legacy and make an impact on this world. Make others feel loved and valued, and set an example for those who may not know better. Every day, we can make a difference in someone's life, big or small. Let's start looking to take advantage of those opportunities every day.